In her hit song Welcome to New York, Taylor Swift sings: “Like any great love, it keeps you guessing.”

The megastar has certainly done that this week, as preparations began for what appears to be a giant wedding at Madison Square Garden in New York. Vans unloading flowers, food and what looks like the makings of a massive, white fairytale castle, have been seen outside the arena in recent days.

Many had questioned whether Swift was actually holding her wedding to the American footballer Travis Kelce in the huge venue. It was rumoured previously that the singer would tie the knot on her Rhode Island estate, or in the grounds of a castle on the shores of Lake Como. Even the British private members’ club, Estelle Manor in the Cotswolds, was on the list of potential venues. Perhaps the New York City location was an elaborate decoy?

The location was, however, apparently confirmed on Thursday evening when Donna Kelce, the mother of the groom, was seen walking through JFK airport with a huge grin on her face.

While some thought Swift would go for a more understated affair, she has been saying for some time that she wanted a giant wedding with thousands of her closest friends. She told The Graham Norton Show on the BBC last year: “I know it’s gonna be fun to plan because I think the only stressful weddings are the ones where you have a small amount and people are on the bubble. I’m not gonna do that – it’s gonna be fun.”

The couple’s friends and family were also seen leaving the Ritz-Carlton hotel in New York, where rooms are about £1,000 a night, to attend a rehearsal dinner at the stadium on Thursday. These included Swift’s childhood best friend, Abigail Anderson Berard, resplendent in yellow silk, Kelce’s aunt and uncle, and Swift’s publicist Tree Paine.

The actor and author Lena Dunham, Swift’s longtime collaborator Jack Antonoff, the supermodel Gigi Hadid and the Hollywood star Bradley Cooper were also spotted on the approach to Madison Square Garden for the rehearsal. Ed Sheeran, Phoebe Waller-Bridge and Sabrina Carpenter have also been seen arriving in New York City, presumably ahead of the event.

Stars continued to flock to New York throughout the morning on Friday, with Swift’s friend Ellie Goulding spotted at Heathrow for an early flight. The wedding is set to be from 5pm with carriages at midnight.

Eagle-eyed fans noticed one former best friend of Swift, Blake Lively, was not among those at the rehearsal dinner, instead attending a horse show in upstate New York. It has been said the two fell out after private text messages between the actor and Swift were revealed in court documents during a legal battle between Lively and her former co-star Justin Baldoni.

Though Buckingham Palace sources said Prince William, who is friendly with Swift, was not attending, he has given the couple a wedding gift of sorts; by appearing on Kelce’s podcast, which will be out before the wedding at 5pm UK time and midday EST.

Those hoping to get a glimpse of the festivities on the Instagram pages of the hundreds of guests will be disappointed: the happy couple are said to be implementing a strict no phones rule. It is unclear whether details of the wedding will be published; it is rumoured Swift turned down Vogue magazine, which wanted to exclusively cover the event.

One enterprising paparazzo managed to get past all of the security and tents to snap a slim, blurry photo of the decor for the rehearsal dinner. The venue was lit in soft pink lights, with a romantic garden theme similar to that shown in the couple’s engagement photo, which was taken in a rose-filled garden. Echoing this, Swift has chosen apricot-coloured roses to fill the stadium. To signal something special and romantic was happening inside, MSG was lit up a dusky pink on Thursday evening.

For the day itself, it is rumoured Stevie Nicks and Tim McGraw will perform. Swift, who loves to foreshadow events by dropping hints, wore a T-shirt emblazoned with “Stevie Knicks” to the NBA finals last month. It is rumoured her dress will be custom couture by Jonathan Anderson, the head designer at Dior.

The NYPD has its work cut out policing the event, with 11 roads closed and tents set up at the boundary to the restricted area to stop fans from gathering and taking pictures of those entering and leaving. The permit to hold an event of this scale that requires street closures can cost as much as $66,000 a day, according to the New York Times. The New York City permitting office has also authorised an event for up to 1,000 people in the stadium, according to documents obtained by Associated Press.

Perhaps in atonement for the disruption their nuptials are causing on the 4 July weekend, the couple donated $26m (£19m) to charity in the days before. Swift’s representative said: “This week, Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift donated $26m to charities across the United States. They include the following: City Harvest, New York City; Food Bank for NYC; New York Cares; Los Angeles Regional Food Bank; Harvesters – The Community Food Network, Kansas City, MO.”

The couple reportedly selected the celebrity wedding planner Mark Seed to choreograph the event; he is known for keeping out of the spotlight and never speaks to the press about the weddings he organises, which makes him a good choice for those who want to keep their nuptials discreet.

NBC also reported that guests were asked to sign non-disclosure agreements as part of the invitation process.

Swift’s romance with Kelce has been one of the most talked about love stories of the decade. She has always sung about the possibility of dating the guy on the football team, and has been seen deliriously happy next to her real-life jock, after a long string of ill fated romances – many of which have inspired her greatest songs.

Though this week has been a big “will-they-won’t-they” guessing game, it looks like Swift is finally going to have the response she has been waiting for to “it’s a love story, baby just say yes”.